Return to Lily
by One Steamy Shire
Summary: After 13 years of marriage, Frodo leaves Lilith because of his illnesses. Lilith needs solitude, will she get it by going back to her homeland? (Northern Waste) Or will she find it in The Shire? Or somewhere else? PG-13 for mild swearing
1. Prologe to Return to Lily

She had been tending the kids all day, yet fear was growing in the back of her mind. She didnt know what she was fearing, but it was something big, she knew something bad was going to happen. 

Last night she woke up in a cold sweat. She had dreamed about the Northern Waste again. She was born there, but during the revolt of Valiror, she had fled. The revolt leaders had pretty much destroyed her country, and were killing everyone in sight. She had watched her mother, father, and baby sister Emerald murdered by the revoltists. The memories were still fresh when she had seeked sanctuary in the Shire as a 14 year old, and when she was 29, met Frodo at Bilbo's Farewell Party. When she was 46 (and very much in love with him) he had gone away to destroy the One Ring. After he had come back, and 3 years of layover time, they were married in 1423. Peregrin was born that same year, and Galadrielle and Alexandriae were born in 1424. 

But as Frodo held her in his arms, trying to calm her, she forgot all her troubles for a minute, and thought about Frodo, and how lucky she was to have him. She wondered if this is how she was going to spend the rest of her life, and if so, she was damn lucky. 

'Frodo...I have been having nightmares about The Northern Waste-lands again. Its almost like I want to go back there again, but I know that if I do, I will never leave, partly because I'll get killed or the memory of my parents will come back and something inside of me wont let me leave. What shall I ever do Frodo?' Lily whispered to her husband. 

'I do not know Lily. All that I do know is that if you leave, I will be heartbroken. I love you very much and I would hate to lose you. You know that, I know that, the kids know that. So, for my sake, please dont leave us.' 

And that was that. If Frodo told her not to go, it was as good as tying her to a doorpost; she wasnt going anywhere. He had something on her; if he said she couldnt do it, she woudnt. 

But as she thought about it, what would she do if Frodo left her? She would most likely have heart failure; thats how much she loved him. And it wasnt just her who loved Frodo; Pip, Gala and Alexiae loved him to. Gala, especially, for she was Daddy's little girl. She loved hearing stories of her namesake, the White Lady of Lorien, Galadriel. Alexandriae was like her mother, she loved to sing, and Frodo always had the right songs for her, like 

_A! Elbereth Gilthoniel!_

_silivren penna miriel_

_o menel aglar elenath_

_Gilthoniel, A! Elbereth!_

_We still remember, we who dwell_

_In this far land beneath the trees_

_The starlight on the Western Seas._

And Peregrin just loved him because that was his father. What a perfect family this was, she thought to herself. Why Frodo would ever think of leaving or her leaving was absurd. But she knew that Frodo had illnesses, bad ones, that would attack him on March 13th and October 6th, and they hurt him very much. During those times, she sent the kids to Rosie and Sam Gamgee and locked herself in his bedroom, and tended to his every need. He had been almost persuaded by Gandalf and Galadriel to go to the west with them, and he said no, simply because he had a family to raise and that was that. But Lily still worried. 

Earlier that day, Gala had persuaded Frodo to tell her and Alexiae another story about Galadriel, for that was their favorite topic. And he did, telling his usual story, recounting the time they came into the forest of Lothlorien, and his visions in the mirror, jokingly saying ' I remember now seeing 2 hobbit-maids, they looked just like you; they were truly beautiful. And I remember the Lady Galadriel saying that I was to be blessed with them...' And, always, they giggled and said, 'Thats not true father, you didnt see us.' And he always said, 'Is that so? Well I am still surely blessed with two beautiful hobbit-maids, and blessed with a handsome hobbit-lad, and a gorgeous wife.' Lily would usually smile at herself. 

But today was different. Even thought it was only the 10th of March, Frodo had that faraway look in his eyes as he recounted the story. It almost has seemed as if he was tired of telling stories. Lily had started to wonder what was happening to Frodo, if he was getting to old. He was indeed 65, but that wasnt old for a hobbit. She was getting very worried, for Frodo's sake. 

That night, after she had put Peregrin, Galadrielle and Alexandriae to bed, Frodo said to her, 'Lilith, we need to talk.' Whenever he called by Lilith - a name she greatly detested - it meant that something was greatly wrong. 

'Sure Frodo, what is it?' Lily said with a touch of worriedness in her voice.

'It is about my illnesses. It has been 13 years...yes I know - Frodo said, seeing the look on Lily's face - but they are not getting any better. In fact, they are getting worse. I have talked to Gandalf and Galadriel, and they want me to go overseas to the West. And I have decided to do so.' Frodo finished with sadness in his voice.

Lily felt like she had been smacked in the face. This was her husband, the one who, last night, had told her not to go to her homelands, because it would hurt him and the kids. She felt betrayed and hurt and lied to. 

'Frodo,' she started with confusion written all over her face, 'didnt just last night you tell me that I going to the Northern Waste would hurt you? _What do you think this is going to do to me? Did you ever think that maybe we are married, and we are supposed to make decisions together? Oh Frodo, please...oh my god.' Lily was confused and rather upset. _

'Lily, I figured that if I brought this up, you would say no immediately and I would get more and more hurt...'

'Is that all you can think of? Yourself? What about me, and the kids, and the town...Frodo, you should have said something sooner. Do you know how this is going to affect me?...I just dont know what to say.' Lily finished, ready to break into tears. 

'Well okay. I will see you again...maybe again...'

'Wait a second...your leaving right now? Without saying goodbye to the kids or anything? Are you crazy? I wont let you...' Lily yelled at Frodo. 

'I must leave as soon as possible. I can't say goodbye to Gala and Alexiae and Pip, they are going to make me stay. I cant leave them if I go to say goodbye. But I can say goodbye to you, can't I?' Frodo sighed. 

Frodo walked to Lily, and embraced her. She looked at him, and tears silently rolled down her cheeks. He wiped them away, and then kissed her.  Lily felt as if her world was coming to an end, that nothing mattered anymore. After he was done, she could see that he was crying to. She hugged him, and then they cried together. She finally made her last plea...

'Frodo, please don't leave! You have 3 kids to raise, you cant just leave them; its just not right. I dont want them to go through life not knowing who their father is or was. Frodo, I love you, and the kids love you and the whole town loves you. You can't leave, please don't leave...'

Frodo looked at her sadly. 'I'm sorry Lily. My illnesses, they hurt me so. I cant go on living like this, it's killing me. I must leave. Dont you want me to be better, to live without pain?'

'Yes, but I dont want you to leave. Please Frodo, I beg of you, for the sake of Peregrin and Galadrielle and Alexandriae, please dont leave...'

Frodo made a move towards the door; Lily slammed it shut. 

'NO FRODO! I WONT LET YOU LEAVE!' She screamed.

Frodo brushed her request aside. 'Goodbye Lilith, until we meet again...Adieu, and keep this holy kiss... I love you...'* He kissed her again, and then opened the door, and walked out of Bag End.

Lily put her back against the door, and slid all the way down. She crumpled into a ball, and exploded with tears. After a few minutes, she heard someone running up the stairs to Bag End. She opened the door, and saw that it was her best friend, Rose Gamgee. 

Rose looked at her weirdly. 'What...happened?... I heard screaming.... and I got worried... and I ran...all...the way here...' Rose panted out of breath.

'He's...gone.' Lily sobbed.

'Who's gone dear?'

'Frodo...he said that his illnesses were hurting him, and that he had to go overseas to the West to cure it. Oh and I begged him to stay, but...but he wouldnt!' Lily cried. 

'Oh sweetie, oh Lily, I am so sorry.' Tears welled up in Rose's eyes. 'I wish, oh how I wish there was something I could do. But I can't...I can't...' Rose bursed into tears, and held Lily's head for most of the night. 

The next morning, when Lily woke up, she found herself at the door of Bag End. At first, she didnt remember what happened, and wondered what the hell she was doing there, and why Rose was asleep next to her. But suddenly it dawned on her, and she became extremely upset. She ran to the kid's bedrooms, and found them there, awake, playing games.

Lily heaved a sigh, and called her children forward. 'Pippin, Gala, and Alexiae, I have some bad news. Your father Frodo' -she choked up- 'has left to go overseas. I do not know if we will ever seen him again.' 

The children looked at her with misty eyes. Lily could only say ' I'm sorry.' She started to cry again, and this time, her kids cried with her, even though they found it strange that a grown up was crying...

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* - "Adieu, and keep this holy kiss..." William Shakespeare, _Romeo and Juliet, Act 1, scene 5._


	2. Chapter 1 - New Beginnings

'Peregrin, I absolutely forbid it. You will not see Elanor after dark. As long as you live in this house, you will obey me. You don't know whats out there... '

'Oh mother, why do you worry so? Pippin is an almost grown up man, he can handle those things for himself. Besides, Elanor is Samwise Gamgee's daughter, they wont do anything...improper...' Galadrielle added with a snicker.

'Thanks Gala, but I can handle this myself. Your supposed to defending me, not adding to the list of worries that Mother already has. 

Anyways Mother, why cant we? We're just going to Ted Sandyman's party, It isnt like some sort of bad thing. I am almost 23, why cant I make my own decisions?' Peregrin frumped.

'Pippin, I love you sweetie, I just dont want to lose you. I know you are engaged to Elanor, but as long as you live in this house, I still have something over your head.... What I mean is that if you leave, ill feel if something missing.... I guess I'll miss having a man around the house.' Lily said with a sigh. 

 It wasnt like she completely forgot about _him. Frodo was always on her mind, after he left her to go seek sanctuary in Eressea. She with 10 year old Pip, and 9 year old Gala and Alexandriae, it was hard not to forget him. After all, these were his kids; he knew about them, they knew about their father, they just refused to talk about him. Alexiae called him a coward for leaving once, and although Lily smacked her, she wasnt completely wrong. It was kind of cowardly of Frodo to leave her with the kids, but he had his own reasons, and she wasnt to mingle with them. _

'Gala, why dont you run down to Fro's and grab some things for dinner, okay? Rose is coming for tea, and we have some personal matters to attend to.' Lily said.  

'Sure thing mother. Besides, I havent talked to Fro in awhile and rumor has it that he's going to ask me to Ted Sandyman's party....'

'Gala...'

'Okay, Okay I'll go. But don't chide me if I'm late...' Galadrielle said with a smile.

After Galadrielle left, and Pip and Alexiae went off to do something, a flashback came to Lily; the night Frodo left her. 

_'Frodo, please don't leave! You have 3 kids to raise, you cant just leave them; its just not right. I dont want them to go through life not knowing who their father is or was. Frodo, I love you, and the kids love you and the whole town loves you. You can't leave, please don't leave...'_

_Frodo looked at her sadly. 'I'm sorry Lily. My illnesses, they hurt me so. I cant go on living like this, it's killing me. I must leave. Dont you want me to be better, to live without pain?'_

_'Yes, but I dont want you to leave. Please Frodo, I beg of you, for the sake of Peregrin and Galadrielle and Alexandriae, please dont leave...'_

_Frodo made a move towards the door; Lily slammed it shut. _

_'NO FRODO! I WONT LET YOU LEAVE!' She screamed._

_Frodo brushed her request aside. 'Goodbye Lilith, until we meet again...Adieu, and keep this holy kiss... I love you...' He kissed her again, and then opened the door, and walked out of Bag End._

She couldnt stop him from leaving, so when he shut the door, she broke down and sobbed and sobbed. It must have really hurt him, because he had never called by her real name, Lilith. When early the next morning, when Galadrielle, Peregrin, and Alexandriae inquired where their father was, Lily just couldnt lie to them. She told them the whole story, and at the end, they all broke into tears. But the kids were grown up now, they didnt worry if their father was ever coming back, all they worried about was how they looked and what maiden or man was courting them this month. But to Lily, there was something missing, something that couldnt be filled.

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'What am I to do Rose? I am becoming more and more melancholy as the days go by. I fear the kids will fall into my trap to. I just cant pretend to be happy anymore. There's something missing, something that Frodo fulfilled for me. It's been over 10 years, you would think I was over it yet...' said Lily sadly. 

Rose looked at her. 'There's nothing much I can do for a broken heart. 10 years is a long time, but not long enough for your heart to mend. I'm sorry you feel this way, and I wish I knew how you felt. Frodo shouldnt have done what he did, but he did, and there is nothing that I can say or do to make you feel any better.' 

'Thanks Rose...I just don't know what to do anymore.' 

'Don't do anything. Enjoy your life; enjoy time with your kids. Stop your sadness. Be happy that you are well, and that your kids are well. You cant have everything.' Rose said sharply.

'Maybe you're right. This weekend, Gala and Alexiae are going to Brandy Hall to stay with Meriadoc and Estella for a couple of days while I go out to the Grey Havens...'

'You're not going overseas are you?' Rose interrupted.

'No, but I am going there. I want to see the place where Frodo last saw Middle-earth. Maybe that missing piece of me will come back, maybe not. But I am going anyways, to find some solitude.'

'Where is Peregrin going to stay?'

'Right here in Bag End. Him, Galadrielle and Alexandriae just think that I am going on a business endeavor, but I am going to find solitude.' Lily said.

'I hope you find what you are looking for...honestly. I wish I could stay longer, but leaving Sam with Primrose for too long drives him insane. Lilith  --Lily cringed at the name-- promise me you won't do anything you'll regret. I'll see you at tea tomorrow, okay?'

And with that, Rose Gamgee headed out the door to her house at number 13 New Row.


	3. Chapter 2 - The Grey Havens

On Friday, Galadrielle headed for Fro's house and her twin sister Alexandriae headed for Estella Brandybuck's house at Brandy Hall. Lily saddled up her pony, Lilith and headed off to the Grey Havens. She felt as if something was calling her to go there...but she didnt know why.... yet.

The way there, to keep company, she hummed her favorite song

_A! Elbereth Gilthoniel!_

_silivren penna miriel_

_o menel aglar elenath_

_Gilthoniel, A! Elbereth!_

_We still remember, we who dwell_

_In this far land beneath the trees_

_The starlight on the Western Seas._

This comforted her, yet saddened her, for it was Frodo's favorite walking song. Everything seemed to remind her of Frodo. Lily seemed like she was in a nightmare, she missed Frodo so much. She wondered if Frodo ever thought of her, or for that case, still remembered who she was. She deeply wished she could see him again, sometimes so strongly she wished she were dead so that she could see him in heaven. But then she would think back to her kids, and it would kill her to think she would do something like that just to see her husband. 

She arrived at the Grey Havens on Saturday morning, and had quite a bit of shock. Everyone in the town was rushing about, all excited about something, but it involved the docks. This wasnt the solitude that she was looking for, and contemplated leaving, but something told her that she should check out what was happening at the docks. 

When she got at the docks, she was dumbstruck. There was a boat coming in! Boats from the West never come in, it was surely a rarity. She was quite surprised, but her melancholy sank in and she watched the boat come in with a sad face.  The boat docked and some strangers came off the boat, but the last one off was someone she swore she knew. He was short, with brown curly hair, most certainly a hobbit. And then it hit her...

It was Frodo.

Lily was dumbfounded. She started shaking and thought about turning around and going home. But her love for him won out and she screamed 'FRODO!'

Frodo turned around and caught her eye, but then turned around and started heading back for the ship. Lily thought to herself  "_I've lost him once, I am not going to lose him again..."_

'No Frodo, wait!' Lily screamed while she pushed through the crowds. She started running for the dock, slowly catching up to Frodo, and then leaped towards him. 

'Frodo, your back! How...and why...oh I am so glad to see you...! I love you Frodo.'

'Lilith --again she frowned at the name--, I have come back, but only for a short time. I had hoped not to see you, for I feared I would break your heart again when I left. But now that you have found me, I guess I can't run away from you. How are Peregrin and Galadrielle and Alexandriae?'

Lily couldnt take it anymore. She fell into Frodo's arms, weeping and sobbing. ' Oh Pip's fine, he is going to get married to Elanor Gamgee soon, Gala and Alexiae are still the talk of the town, Gala's courting Fro the Gardener, and Alexiae is doing fine. How are things in the West? I mean Galadriel and Elrond and Gandalf?'

'They are doing well. They send their wishes.' Frodo replied. 

'Are you heading back to Bag End tonight? Or are you staying here in Grey Havens? You should really come back to Bag End, the kids would love to see you.'

'I dont think I can go back to Bag End right away Lily. I think I need a week of rest and solitude somewhere...'

'How about Brandy Hall? You grew up there...it should be solitude enough...or what about the Great Smials...you always loved it there...' Lily interrupted

'I need someplace far away from people that know me, or for that matter far away from people at all. I need to get reacquainted with Middle-earth, and it might take a while. Don't worry Lilith; I will come back to the Shire and Bag End in a week. I will see you there. Dont tell the kids that I am here or that I am coming. I don't want them to get all excited and tell the whole town. I love you.' 

With that little speech and a quick kiss, Frodo was off. Finally Lily realized what she was missing. It was Frodo.


	4. Chapter 3 - Frodo's Return

All that week, she was very anxious awaiting Frodo to come. A couple of times, she'd open her mouth to say something to the kids, but then she would shut her mouth. She was pretty much a nervous wreck, waiting for Frodo to come home. But on Friday, there came a knock on the door, and she knew who it was.

'Gala, Pip and Alexiae, would you please get the door?' Lily wanted her kids to see their father first. 

Lily heard them open the door, and she heard Frodo say  'Hullo Galadrielle, Hullo Peregrin, Hullo Alexandriae.' Her kids were silent for a minute, and then Gala screamed, 'Oh Mother, It's Frodo! He's come back!'

Lily ran to the door, in mock suprisement. 'Frodo...' is all she could say. Never in 10 years of him being gone did she ever think she would see him again. And there he was, standing in front of her kids, smiling. 

She rushed towards him, and he swept her up into his arms. 'Oh Frodo, you're...you're back...'

'Yes, Lilith, I am back, if only for a short time. I have come for a little while. But I am here...'

In the middle of Frodo's speech, Sam came bursting through the door. 'Lily, I heard Gala scream and I...' Sam caught Frodo's eyes. His mouth dropped, and he said, 'Oh Frodo, you're back. How glad am I to see you. I thought you weren't coming back, but you did. Rose will be so happy to see you, and so will Elanor and Fro...'

'Yes they will. Tomorrow, if they can be spared, you should come to Bag End for a luncheon. I'm sure that Lilith can whip up a good meal.' Frodo said.

'And that I can. I will see you all tomorrow. Goodbye!' Lily said to Sam cheerfully, for she knew that tonight would be the best night, for her husband was back, and nothing could keep her out of his arms tonight.__


	5. Chapter 4 - A Marriage Proposal

After a couple of weeks, the whole Shire knew of Mr. Baggins return. Day and night, they were flooded with calling relatives, well-wishers, and what not. It was getting to the point where Lily was pretty damn sick of it.

A month after Frodo's arrival, in the morning, Lily heard a knock at the door and flew out of bed to answer it in only her nightclothes. It was Fro. 

'Hello Fro! What brings you to Bag End so early in the morning? I believe that Gala isnt up yet...' Lily started

'Mrs. Baggins, I have come to see Mr. Frodo, if he is awake...I'll come back later if he isnt.' Frodo replied nervously. 

'Fro, is there something bothering you? Why do you need to talk to Frodo? Why are you so nervous? Why are you calling me Mrs. Baggins?...'

'I meant no harm Ms. Lily, I meant no harm. I just want to talk to Mr. Frodo...'

Suddenly Lily understood why Fro was here. He was going to ask Frodo for Gala's hand in marriage. She took another look at Frodo, and burst into tears of happiness. 

Fro was dumbstruck. 'Ms. Lily, what did I say? I am so sorry, although I don't quite understand why you are crying like that...' Fro scratched his head. 'I'll go now...'

'No wait Fro! It's okay...hold on, I'll get Frodo...' Lily laughed through her tears of happiness. She ran into the bedroom, where Frodo was standing, getting dressed. 

'Frodo, Fro is here to see you. I think he is going to ask you if he can marry Galadrielle.... oh isnt that great news!' Lily exploded. __

'I guess...how old is Frodo-lad? And Galadrielle?' Frodo asked blandly. 

Lily thought a moment. 'Gala is 22, Fro is...hold on...' Lily quickly added up the years in her head. 'Fro is 23. Same age as Pippin.' 

'The coming of age is 33, don't you think that they should wait a little longer...' Frodo started to say

'Frodo! Where is your sense of love for your daughter and going to be son-in-law? Huh?' Lily said with a little of anger in her voice. 

'I dont know Lily, I think they are still too young...'

'Frodo, they've been in love since they were old enough to understand what love was all about. Cut them some slack. Things have changed.'

Lily thought that Frodo was being a little rigid, or maybe it was because he didn't want to lose his daughter; but then again, he always had Alexandriae, so his actions didnt make any sense. 

'Frodo, just because we were in our 40's when we got married doesn't mean we have to make them wait to. They're only young...'

'That's my point. They are young. Are these the people they want to spend the rest of their lives with? We don't want them to make the same mistakes we did.' Frodo said

'Frodo, are you implying that you dont want to spend the rest of your life with me? You just said that you don't want them to make the same mistakes we did...Was I a mistake?' Lily huffed, pissed.

'Lily, calm down! You're blowing everything out of proportion! Look this is stupid, if you want Fro to marry Gala...wait, thats it! Ask Gala if she wants to marry Fro. Go right now to her, Lily, ask her.' Frodo said

Lily walked into the kitchen, looking for Gala. _Is she still asleep? thought Lily. She found Gala awake in her room and getting dressed. _

'Gala, I have an important question to ask you. Fro is at the door. Before you go running out to him' Lily started, seeing Gala inching towards the door, 'you need to answer this for me. If he asked you to marry him, would you say yes?' Lily stated simply to her daughter.

Gala looked like she was going into shock. 'Fro is here, hes going to ask me to marry him?! Oh mother, am I ready? Will I make a good mother? Oh mother, I'm...I'm...scared!' Gala blurted out, and started to cry. 

'Oh Gala, don't cry sweetie, everything will be fine.'

'Am I ready?' Gala inquired

'Do you love Fro with all your heart? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with him? If the answer is no, then I guess you are not.'

'I do _love him, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. __I really love him mother.' Gala said through her tears._

'Okay. Tell your father that. Hes talking with Fro right now.' Lily said as she wiped the tears away from Gala's cheeks. 'Go see your husband.' 

Gala ran off, and Lily was left alone with her last daughter, Alexiae. She was still asleep, most likely dreaming peacefully. Lily wondered what would happen when all of her children left her. She started to cry thinking about it. Loosing all of her kids was something she hadnt wanted to deal with yet, and now it was happening. She pushed back the hair on Alexia's face and looked into it. She was pretty, just like her sister, but not as outgoing. She had never liked any of the hobbit lads, unlike her sister who was always with this man or this one. Alexiae was different than her sister in that way. Lily thought, _She's our last hope for this family; there isnt going to be anymore like her. Slowly and sadly, Lily walked out to the kitchen, happy but sad, for she was losing one of her children, and couldn't bear to watch._


	6. Chapter 5 - The Sickness

Lily fell asleep that night upset and confused. She was sinking into her old melancholies again, and she couldn't understand why. _Frodo is back, isnt that what I wanted? Lily thought to herself. __Why am I like this?  She kept thinking to herself. She looked over at Frodo, sleeping soundly. She kissed him lightly on his head, and crawled out of bed. She crept silently to the den, and sat in front of the dying embers of the fire. She had never felt so upset, except when Frodo left. She looked at the calendar and saw that it was March 13. 'Damnit. Frodo's going to love today.' she mumbled to herself. 'Eh, what am I going to do today? I hate March 13th.' _

Lily wondered if maybe her melancholy was caused by a want to see her homelands again. 'But they caused me so much pain. Everyone and everything. How could I go back?' 

'But you need to see what its like now. Maybe it's changed. You don't know that.' said a little voice in her brain. 

'But I can't leave Frodo and Pip and Gala and Alexiae. They won't understand.' 

'But you can make them. You should leave the day after tomorrow.' said the little voice inside her brain. And this time she listened. She watched the fire die out completely, and then walked to her bedroom, and crawled into bed next to Frodo. 

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March 13th came without a vengeance for Frodo. His body was wracked with pain and the mists of meaninglessness and nothingness. Pippin went off in search of Sam, while Lily, Gala, and Alexiae tended to Frodo. 

'Mother, is Frodo all right? He's starting to scare me.' Gala inquired nervously. 

'Don't worry Gala; your father will be all right. He's just...very sick right now. But he'll be better by tomorrow, so don't worry.' Lily said, trying to sound cheerful, when cheerfulness was the farthest thing from her mind. 

A second later (and not a moment too soon), Samwise Gamgee came bursting through the door. 'How is Mr. Frodo doing Ms. Baggins?' 

'Sam, he's doing pretty bad, but why do you keep addressing him and me as if you were a servant?' Lily asked, wondering. 

'Force of habit, Lilith.' Sam said as Lily cringed at her true name. 'But is he still alive and breathing?'

'Still alive and breathing, but mumbling about Mordor and Orodiuin. Smèagol too. Keeps going on about Smègols's trickery.' Lily finished with a sigh. 

'Oh well, I might as well attend to him,' Sam began, 'and by the way Galadrielle, Fro is looking for you. He's down at number 13.'

'Thanks Mr. Gamgee.' Gala said with a smile, and skipped off to number 13 New Row. 

But at Bag End, there was no skipping or even happiness while Sam and   Lily feverishly watch Frodo slip into the shadow world. Lily tried talking to him, to make him feel better inside, but he was too far-gone to acknowledge or even care what she was saying. 'There is no hope for Middle-earth, everything is barren...sharkey...SHARKEY!' Lily could get that much from Frodo the whole day. 

She fell asleep in bed next to him after his fever broke at about 1 in the morning. She offered Sam a bedroom, but he said that he best be getting back to Rosie; he had left her all day with little Primrose. As she fell into that dream world, she had decided: _I am going to tell him tomorrow. I must go to the Northern Waste. She mumbled that to herself as she fell asleep. _


	7. Chapter 6 - The Northern Waste

The next morning, Lily made up her mind to tell Frodo that she was leaving for the Northern Waste the next morning. So after dinner, she went up to Frodo and said, 'Frodo, I have made up my mind, I am going to the Northern Waste to visit. A part of me is still there, even though it practically destroyed me. I dont know what it is Frodo, but I do hope you let me leave...' Lily began slowly, fully knowing that Frodo was most likely against it. 

'Lily, I really dont want you to go, but if you must, go...but come back soon...' Frodo sighed wearily.

'Frodo, why made you change your mind? I thought you were against me leaving; you said that it you hurt you too much if I did leave...' Lily said, aghast. 

'Oh Lily, I figured that if you really wanted to go, you would go anyway, even if I had said you couldnt. Theres no use in me saying you cant, because you'll find a way around it... I will miss you...' Frodo said.

Lily said, sighing, 'But you can always say goodbye...'

Frodo wrapped his arms around her waist and looked into her eyes. Lily sighed deeply and put her head on his shoulder. He tilted her head up, and kissed her deeply, one kiss after another. She ran her fingers through his hair, and walked slowly to the bedroom, where they both collapsed onto the bed...

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Early the next morning, Lily started off for the Northern Waste. She said to Frodo, 'Dont worry about me, I'll be fine. I'll see you in 2 or 3 weeks. I love you.' She wrapped her arms around his waist, kissed him goodbye, and was off.

It had been over 50 years since she has last stepped foot inside of the Northern Waste-lands, but it was completely different from the last time she was there. Everything was barren. There wasn't a single living thing for leagues around; everything looked (and felt) dead. It reminded her of when Frodo left in 1418 to destroy the One Ring, and Lotho took over Bag End and destroyed the Shire with the help of Sharkey-Saraman. It brought back bad memories of that time in the Shire; she did not want to relive them. She pushed them to the back of her mind and rode on.

She had been riding for a couple of hours in this barren waste when she came across a farm. _So people do still live here... she thought to herself._

She flagged the farmer down, who was working in the fields. 'Nac uoy llet em woh raf ti si ot eht ytic fo Naltybloh esaelp?' she asked the farmer in the native language of Hsilgne. 

'Ytrof seugael ot eht htron. Eht ytic si gnieb tliuber. ' the farmer replied. 

'Knaht uoy yrev hcum! Yam eht doar esir ot teem uoy!' She added as a sort of thanks. 

'Dna syawla yam ti eb rof uoy.' the farmer called in reply to the already galloping away Lily.

Forty leagues away is pretty far, Lily thought to herself. She spurred her pony on faster. The scenery didn't change much, except for a farm here and there, maybe some green patches of land, but mostly everything was barren waste. Trees had no leaves, grass was only stubble, and the sky was gray. _It is so unhappy, Lily thought.  __How can anyone live here and not be unhappy? This is nothing like the Shire. Oh how I wish I was back there now, with its happy people and all the greenery...I dont think I can go on..._

But she found it in here to go on. She had to make it to Naltybloh before sundown, or she wouldnt have anywhere to sleep.

Needless to say, sundown came and she hadnt reached Naltybloh (or in the Common Tongue, Holbytlan) and had nowhere to rest or eat. But she spotted a farm in the distance. _If only I could get there, Lily thought, __maybe I could get some sort of lodging. _

10 minutes later, Lily knocked on the door of what appeared to be a small farmhouse. When the lady answered the door, Lily made her plea. 

'Esaelp madam, I deen emos gnigdol rof thginot dna I evah erehwon ot yats. I ma gniyrt ot ekam ti ot eht ytic fo Naltybloh. Fi uoy dluow eb os dnik sa ot tel em yats ereh rof a thgin, I dluow eb yllanrete luftaerg. ' 

The lady frowed for a minute, then smiled. 'Erus raed, tub yhw era uoy gniog ot taht ytic? Ti si llits ni sniur. Tub sey, uoy yam. Tahw si ruoy eman yb eht yaw?' The lady inquired. 

'Ylil Sniggab, mam.' Lily said to her. Lily felt that this lady was familar, in some way...she just didnt know how. 

'Mam, tahw si ruoy enam? Rof uoy deksa ym eman tub i od ton wonk sruoy.' 

'Ho! Mi yrros, I ma Eiloj Erimaf.' Jolie replied

Something about that name sounded famliar, but she couldn't remember from where...

Lily came in to the house and made herself comfortable. It was a quaint little farmhouse, with two bedrooms, a living room with a loft above, and a kitchen. Lily couldn't help but _love this house. In a odd way, she felt as if she had been here before. She almost wished that she was leaving Bag End...wait no, she couldn't think that. She promised Frodo that she would come back; she had to keep her promise. _

Jolie had given her a hearty meal, and a warm place to rest. Soon after dinner, Lily had fell asleep like a baby.

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When the first rays of light shone down through the window in the living room, Lily woke up. She saw that Jolie was standing over her. Lily sat up with a start, wondering why the hell she was standing over her. 

'Eiloj, yhw era uoy gnidnats revo em? Did I od gnihtemos gnorw?' Lily wondered.

'You're not from around here are you...' Joliet said in the Common Tongue.

'You can speak the Common Language? Why didn't you tell me? Did you mean to lead me on?' Lily said, a tad angry. 

'You remind me of some one i used to know...always getting angry about the stupidest things. But she's gone now...' Joliet said sadly. 

'Whom are you talking about?'

'My cousin Lilith. She was so dear to me. But her parents died, and she went of to some far off place, I think I was called Rhûn....' Jolie replied sadly. 

There was a long and uncomfortable pause. Lily started to wonder, but then changed her mind. Instead she said, 'Thank you kindly for your hospitality. It was much received. I shall never forget your kindness Jolie Farmire, never. Yam eht doar esir ot teem uoy. Syawla...' Lily said sadly. Jolie was the nicest person she had ever met, besides Frodo, and it killed her that she was going to have to leave her. She made a solemn promise to herself to come back this way on the way back, to see Jolie. She said one last goodbye, packed her things, and sped off on her pony towards Naltybloh. 


End file.
